The 21st! Four years of heartache..

It’s now the 21st of December and the fourth year that my son has been in heaven. Today is Kenny’s Angelversary. God help me.. how have I survived another year with this pain? One thousand, four hundred and sixty one days since I’ve seen my son. Pure agony.

I’ve been asked many times how I get through the days. Holidays. Special occasions. There is no real answer. Each year has been different. In many ways harder, in some minor ways we have learned to find some joy. Today is not one of those days. The dread starts to build as the days get closer to this date, usually starts with the first sign of fall. I then know the 21st of December is approaching. This the hour that our sons heart stopped beating is torture.. I’m panicked, grief stricken, in a daze all at the same time. Each emotion overpowering as I wish so hard with all my might to turn back time. To have that window of time to stop our son from leaving this world. What I wouldn’t do for that wish. Our family whole again. Getting through this day is hard enough then we have to get through Christmas! Our family’s favorite holiday has turned into the saddest time of the year. Through prayer and faith we remain. Together our family does the best we can.

Our precious Kenny! Forever 17!

Your not alone if your struggling through the Christmas season missing your child. The sadness is so heavy. I pray we all are able to feel even the smallest spark of the Christmas spirit, I wish that for us all!

With love, hugs and understanding!

KennyBugs Momma, Angela!

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